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Beyond Exhausted

Beyond Exhausted
3am…..


It’s  3:04 am on Friday and I am at work writing this post.

Did you know that I work nights?

12 hours at a time?

Yes, I “only” work 3 nights a week, but honey let me tell you, those are the toughest three nights of my life.

You see, when you work nights, you spend the day before dreading/anticipating. And the day after in a coma.

Missing life.

I used to be able to wake up at 1 pm the night after I worked( if I didn’t have to work again that night) and do things.

Have a life.

Now, I’m lucky if I manage to shower, pick up Pookah, and get something on the table for dinner before I pass out again as soon as Pookah goes to sleep.

Needless to say, life has suffered.

I am BEYOND exhausted.

I have no energy.

I have no interest in anything but when can I sleep. Or lay down, or nap or just….

My Life is suffering.  My blog, my photography, my relationship with my husband, my health, my fitness, my home.

My temper is shorter. I find myself snapping at Pookah when I used to have patience.

C-Dub and I don’t really talk. It’s like we are two ships passing in the night and when we are together, all I want to do is sleep.  I cried the other night when he was trying sooo hard to create a little romance and in my head all I wanted him to do was leave me alone so I could sleep.

I’m not eating well.  I swear, Wednesday after I worked, I ate a container of yogurt…..and that was it.  I was hungry around 9 after I put Pookah to bed, but by the time I realized it, I was in bed and couldn’t muster the energy to get out of bed, go downstairs and make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

I think I might be slightly depressed.

I need to get off of night shift.

I talked to my manager a couple of weeks ago, and she said most “likely” I will be able to go to day shift in June.

June.

That’s 3 months away.

OK 2.

That’s 63 days from now.

I don’t know if I can survive 63 more days.

Because I am beyond exhausted.

  • Reply
    kita
    March 30, 2012 at 8:34 am

    2 more months that’s not too bad. Every time you go to work keep saying 2 more months 2 more months. It was hard when I use to work on the weekends and had a swing shift I can imagine how hard it is to work overnight.
    kita recently posted..Kita’s Chronicles: Convo with a the hubsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Disco Diva
    March 30, 2012 at 9:26 am

    I was hoping that moving off weekends would be easier for you and your marriage…but that night thing is a beast! Day sleep is never as good…I don’ think the body ever adjusts. June will be here soon…until then…stay strong.
    Disco Diva recently posted..Cancer sucksMy Profile

  • Reply
    Dr. Reginia
    March 30, 2012 at 9:38 am

    I’m so sorry to hear this L. I hope things get better soon. I’ve worked nights once in my life for 3 weeks and that was tough. I hope you find a day position soon.
    Dr. Reginia recently posted..Instagram; I LOVE Instagr.amMy Profile

  • Reply
    KalleyC
    March 30, 2012 at 10:41 am

    I’m very sorry to hear that you’re so tired. Night shifts are so hard, like you said, not just on you but on everyone. June will be here before you know it. Hopefully, you’ll be back to yourself soon.
    KalleyC recently posted..Two AmericasMy Profile

  • Reply
    adrienne
    March 30, 2012 at 11:02 am

    Praying that you get on day shift before June. I love the scripture that says God will perfect that which concerns you. This concerns you, so trust that God will work it out. (((HUGS)))
    adrienne recently posted..Pics from my G2- Phone DumpMy Profile

  • Reply
    Krissy
    March 30, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    you can do it honey! just hang in there!

  • Reply
    Mimi
    March 31, 2012 at 1:32 am

    Hang in there. June will be here before you know it. Have you talked to C Dub about what you are feeling and possibly need to take a day to yourself to sleep and get on track. I think he would understand.
    Mimi recently posted..I’m Organizing…in my headMy Profile

  • Reply
    Amber
    March 31, 2012 at 1:02 pm

    Love, prayers, and hugs to you! As the woman of the house, you
    Amber recently posted..Thought of the Day: Life & White ShoesMy Profile

  • Reply
    Amber
    March 31, 2012 at 1:02 pm

    Love, prayers, and hugs to you! As the woman of the house, you
    Amber recently posted..Thought of the Day: Life & White ShoesMy Profile

    • Reply
      Amber
      March 31, 2012 at 1:04 pm

      Ok, I was typing and my little one decided she wanted to type too! lol As I was trying to say that as the woman of the house, you’re the nucleus of it all. So if mama’s not right, ain’t nothin’ right! I hope things turn around soon, starting with your schedule.
      Amber recently posted..Thought of the Day: Life & White ShoesMy Profile

  • Reply
    My Traveling Troop
    April 1, 2012 at 12:46 pm

    The night shift sounds tough! Hang in there! My fingers are crossed that you start a normal shift soon!

    Cheers,
    Kristina
    P.S. Thank you for stopping by my blog on my SITS day! I smiled when I saw your comment!

  • Reply
    Diva (in Demand)
    April 1, 2012 at 11:51 pm

    I don’t want to say hang in there or you’ll make it….because when you’re that exhausted it seems like forever. But like Adrienne I want to share my favorite scripture with you.

    ~Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished! (Luke 1:45)

    Getting off nights is for you….so it’ll be yours.
    Diva (in Demand) recently posted..Ghirardelli Milk Chocolate – ALL NATURALMy Profile

  • Reply
    Cam | Bibs & Baubles
    April 2, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    oh honey, this post makes me sad. I hope these two months go by faster than you would think. Looking forward to things turning around soon. I’m claiming it for you! Hang in there. 🙂
    Cam | Bibs & Baubles recently posted..Get Ready!My Profile

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