A Step Backwards
The past few weeks, my boy has been going through it:
- a week long stomach virus
- a cold
- a bad cough that had us bringing out Mr Neb at 3 am.
He’s better, but now we have a new problem: potty training regression.
I guess it started when Pookah had the stomach virus about 3 weeks ago. He had diarrhea and couldn’t always make it to the bathroom. It would happen at school and at night.
Poor little guy.
But the sickness passed. And wetting the bed in the middle of the night came to stay.
The first night, I thought it was a fluke. I mean, he’s only been potty trained since about September. And he was still wearing pullups to bed until about a month ago. We ran out of pullups and he just started wearing no underwear to bed. No fuss. He did fine. But now….
This is frustrating on my part to say the least, but the really sad part is that poor Pookah is ashamed. He had a recent accident at school where he had a bowel movement that the teacher didn’t discover until she went to help him with his coat. When I asked him why he didn’t go to the bathroom, or at least tell his teacher that he didn’t make it, he just hung his head and said.
“didn’t want poor ms W to have to clean me up.”
Sigh.
Later on, he told me ” Schoolmate B called me a baby. He said only babies go on themselves.”
I spent the rest of my day reassuring him that he was a big boy and that even big boys have accidents from time to time.
And you KNOW I went up to his school the next day and had a chit chat with his teacher. She had heard the offender and punished him appropriately. And that’s when she let me know that she thought he was having a regression since he had been sick.
And it does get worse when he is sick, I’ve noticed. For instance, I got up 4 times the other night:
- Twice for asthma related breathing issues and
- Twice for accidents in the bed.
I don’t know how to help my boy.
He always cries or is just really sad when he calls in the middle of the night to tell us that he has wet himself. He always need assurance that he is still a big boy.
I don’t know how to fix this.
My first inclination is to put him back in pull ups at night. Just until it’s not a big deal anymore. Just so we can all take a break from worrying about it. We seem to be doing ok during the day. i just remind him a little more often than I used to and he makes it. And we make it through naptime just fine( most of the time). I have always limited the amount he drinks before bed, so I don’t think that is the problem.
But if I put him back in pullups, doesn’t that send the message that yes, you are a baby and you need these?
For now, I’ve just invested in three extra sets of sheets. Just in case.
But other than that, I’m stumped.
Potty training veterans, I need your help!
Any suggestions?
Thalia’s going through this too. We just put her back in pull-ups. It’s less stress on everyone that way.
She didn’t have any problems going back to pull-ups?
*sigh* I am not a potty training expert by any means but it really seems as if pookah’s confidence is shaken. I wouldn’t do the pull-ups and I would make a really big deal (celebrate) the normal potty times that he is going to show that he *can* do that and that he can certainly get back to normal. I would not do the pullups, because you are right I think that would be validation AND would do more damage to pookah’s self esteem. Poor baby. Hold on, it will get better.
Everytime he makes it to the morning dry, I try to remember to celebrate. And everytime he goes during the day I say ” yay big boy!” I think we really need to rebuild his confidence.
Pio
You finally comment on my blog and all I get it ” pio”? What does that mean? LOL
Poor little dude. I think you are doing a great job with supporting and trying to reassure him. He sounds like he can express his feelings pretty well. Maybe talk with him about what would help him feel better. If he says pull-ups, then go with it. Good luck. Hugs!
I have to figure out how to ask him, but I don’t think he’s going to agree. 🙁
We’re just embarking on the potty training journey, so I’m not an expert. I hate that he feels so bad for his accidents. If you think the pull ups will do more harm than good, forego them for now. Or just sit him down and explain that even big boys need a little extra support and pull ups aren’t bad.
Awww I just want to give him a hug, especially after reading the line about this teacher cleaning him. Good luck.
Good idea! I’m going to ask him what he thinks
Jasmine was having accidents at school out of pure laziness a few weeks ago and I put her in pull ups to teach her a lesson because she also feels like those are for babies. I told her if she can’t go like she supposed to then she needs to wear them. We haven’t had an accident since then.
This weekend she took a dump. . . in her clothes. . . on purpose. . . yea she was back in those pull ups on saturday for another lesson. It works for me for that purpose.
my son in law maybe needs some good nites. Those are for bigger kids and have bigger kids on the package. Show him that even some big kids still have accidents and need some extra assistance. Also, if you’re not already, make him potty before bed. I stop letting jas drink at 7pm because her bedtime is 830.
He had graduated to the good nights, but HE told me that they were pull-ups when I suggested it.
Oh, we potty before bed and liquids are limited before bedtime already. It’s do weird. One night he drank 3 large cups of water and didn’t go until the morning. But he had 1/2 cup of water the next night and went three times. I’m just loss
Oh, I wish I had some wise advice to give. But, I don’t. 🙁 My first daughter is potty trained, but since I have just one child who is, I have no idea about what could work for other children. I think consistency is key, however. I think if pull ups seem to be what will help you both get through the night, then I’m all for them. But then, when would that phase end? Or, maybe you shouldn’t worry about that at this point. Oh, I’m clueless. Sorry. 🙁
That’s my thing? If we put him back in the “nighttime” underwear as we call them, when would we stop?
I got nothing! 🙁
I feel bad for the little guy and you. I’m sure being sick has him all off. I wish I had some good nuggets of wisdom for ya.
Awww poor thing I think it’s because he was sick. I don’t have a problem with sheets you don’t have the plastic covering? The baby has sons old toddler bed and it has a plastic mattress so all I had to do was spray and wipe. He will be back on it soon
Yes, we have the waterproof mattress. So I spray and wipe too. But at 3 am…..
I’m sorry all this is happening and it breaks my heart to think of Pookah being embarrassed =( Nia’s had regression in PT due to sickness and we just had to work our way through it and wait it out until she got back on track. ::hugs::
Now I am wondering if its developmental. Addison went through this last week. She wet herself at the mall twice, has made BMs in the bed and then after a bout two weeks she was back I normal. I say no Pull ups that would be a move backwards
Continue to reassure him and celebrate his successes. I would try pull ups again and ease them off with each success.
Tell my virtual nephew that his auntie is cheering for him.
They make these new pads, Walmart and Target both carry them I think? They’re by Goodnight and they are basically overpriced chux pads, LOL. With sticky spots so that they don’t move around. Anyway, they hold a LOT…I have a partially tube fed child and it held a tube leak one night, which is even worse than pee. 😛 If you don’t want to do pullups, maybe you could put them under him until he’s past this and then instead of having to change sheets, you just have to pull the pad?
http://www.amazon.com/Goodnites-Disposable-Bed-Mats-Count/dp/B007E500KE (although of course Amazon is out, lol. but as I said I’ve found them at Walmart and Target)
Good idea! I’ll have to look for these thanks!
Try getting up and reminding him to go a few times. Maybe you can also think about getting one of those bed wetting alarms that wakes the child up when he begins to wet the bed.