Life..Interrupted….
So I’ve been thinking of not writing this post for so long that no other posts want to be written until this one is off of my mind.
Here’s the deal.
About 6 months ago, I took out my IUD. I’m 37, Pookah was 3 almost 4. If I was even thinking about having another one, the time was ripe. IT WAS TIME. So I convinced myself. My ovaries were twitching and I had this anxious feeling around babies.
But nothing happened.
Each month, I have watched as my period came and went, came and went, and came and went again.
6 times.
I’ve endured all the questions, the teasing, the jabs. Even though folks didn’t really know we were” trying”. And just a side note, “trying” to get pregnant is not nearly as easy and fun as folks make it out to be when it doesn’t happen.
I gave my standard answers:
“Do you know how EXPENSIVE Pookah is?”
“Pookah doesn’t need a playmate, he’s got me.”
“SIDE EYE”
What I really want to say is: yes, I want Pookah to have a sibling, yes, we’re trying and my body isn’t cooperating, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW ALL OF THE OTHER THINGS ABOUT IT?
So yeah.
I’ve been trying to be patient. After all, it took a year and a miscarriage before I got pregnant with Pookah. So why would this time be any different? Because I’m 4 years older and so are my eggs. And no matter what the celebrity magazines tell you, women my age don’t get pregnant easily.
I haven’t wanted to write about this because I didn’t want the are you pregnant yet questions. I didn’t want to open up the floodgates on this blog about this struggle/journey/time/whatever it is.
But me being me, it was killing me not to share.
Sigh.
OK that’ s all.
Back to our regularly scheduled programming.
This is one of those times when I wish I was close enough to come by for a drink and a hug.
Yep, what PreshusMe said. Hope a virtual hug will do…{{HUGS}}
I wish i could send you a tall, fine piece of man to rub your back, but since I can’t, please accept these hugs! *hugs hugs hugs*
You made a good point when you mentioned that it is not as easy as most would think. People always asking about other peoples ovaries. They deserve all the side eyes. Positive vibes! Thank you for sharing with us. big hugs.
I sure it wasn’t easy to hit publish on such a personal subject, but thank you for sharing. Sending good vibes, hugs, love and light your way.
When I was younger and we were like rabbits I could not get pregnant for nothing we didn’t use anything for a year not that I was trying but I was not preventing either. My hubs mom said that I should hold my leg up in the air and sit there for a min do you know I followed her advice and I as pregnant with my son. I know TMI but wanted to share. Good luck to you and sending good vibes over your way.
Hugs to you! Just have fun in the trying 🙂 Maybe that’ll take away the anxiety and make it happen sooner! Wishing you the best.
Girl I’m sending you all the good vibes STRAIGHT to your ovaries! lol I know I was one that kept saying Pookah would be an awesome big brother so I won’t prod with any “Are your preggers yet?” but just know I’m on your uterus cheering team! Swim on CDubs 🙂
“I’ve endured all the questions, the teasing, the jabs.” << I think this is what makes it difficult when wanting to open up about issues like this and the fact that people (usually other women) can be so heartless when we all have often secret struggles in various areas is what pains me so much. By sharing your story you let others know they're not alone. I appreciate that and please know that I'm sending prayers your way.
The wait is real. The frustration is real, and doubt creeps in. I’m sending you all the positive vibes that I can. It’s a hard thing to talk about, even harder to hit publish, but you got that off your chest. {{Hugs}}
(((( LaShawn))))
People can be really insensitive. I am 32 and I get the jabs and I don’t even have the husband yet. I know once it happens, baby questions will probably be at the reception. That’s how pushy and brazen people can be.
I am praying for you and sending an AIR HUG! Hang in there!
Sending up prayers for you guys.
Bless you for sharing… Sending UP prayers for you all!
Sending Prayers, Blessing, HIS Grace and Positive Vibes your way. It is well.