I’ve decided( basically) that I’m going.
The question that still remains is:
To do what?
I’m going back for nursing. After all, why waste all of the hard work of the last 11 years?
The REAL question is:
Midwife or Nurse Practitioner?
I’ve always wanted to be a midwife.
But I’m scared.
See, I don’t know if I’m ready for all of that responsibility.
I don’t know if I want it.
I love love love delivering babies. LOVE MY JOB.
I just hate the conditions under which I do it.
But in the last few weeks, I’ve been wondering how it would feel to be in a different role.
To be the one actually delivering the babies.
To be the one actually making the decisions.
Am I ready for that?
Or should I be a Nurse Practitioner and just work in a Doctors office where I’ll have regular hours, no call, no weekends and no holidays?
What do I want to do??
Should I go with the predictable? Should I go with my heart even though my life would still be unpredictable in a way? A life of missing holidays, birthdays and gatherings due to being on call/working?
Or should I not even worry about that and just go with what I love? What I’ve wanted to do since nursing school?
Am I ready for the next hellish 2 1/2 years if I do so?
Am I prepared to spend upwards of 50 K to get an education?
Am I prepared to have a complete change in lifestyle?
Isn’t it time to shit or get off the pot?