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On My Soapbox: Breastfeeding and Gay Marriage

I’m off to my mother in law’s for the weekend for a graduation and Mother’s Day.

But before I go,

Two things:

Number One THIS:

*courtesy of Time Magazine*

Now. Really.

I mean REALLY Time magazine?

I understand the point was to get our attention, but DAMN!

You hear so much about the Mommy wars out there and this is just fueling the fire.

Yes, attachment parenting is a controversial thing in some circles.

Breastfeeding past the age of one is controversial in the US, let alone breastfeeding when your child is 3 years old and standing on a chair to get to your breast on the cover of a national magazine……

While I personally did not want to breastfeed past the age of 1( and Pookah put a stop to it himself at 11 months) I have no issues with women who want to.

What really really REALLY gets me is that this photo on the front cover of this magazine is deliberately provocative. They may say they are trying to start a dialogue, but based on the comments I see, this is just another battle in a long war on who is right, who is wrong, and who is a good parent and who is not.

Number Two:

I usually don’t get political or religious, but in case you DIDN’T know, I am team Obama and a Christian.

Now, I’m not one of those “I will follow behind the president in whatever he says or do” variety.

And I’m not a uber liberal Christian either.

No, I have a brain, and I use it.

There are plenty of things I disagree on with my President.

But his latest stance on gays being allowed to be married is not one of them.

Before I had gay friends, I might not have agreed. But life is an evolution, and hopefully your thoughts and beliefs are too.

I don’t believe in judging others.


Oh sure, I have thoughts, I disagree, and sometimes I can’t help myself, I judge.

But I am also a Christain, so I always remember Matthew 7:

7 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

3 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Basically, the pot can’t call the kettle black…

What if Pookah is gay? What if he decides in the future that he wants to shout his love from the rooftop and marry? Will I cast down my own child?

I don’t think so.

But both of these topics today are issues that we have no right to judge others on. Of course, there is nothing wrong with saying you disagree with the idea of gay marriage, or that you would NEVER breastfeed a three year old.

But everyone has the right to chose what’s right for them.

Respect that.

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  • Reply
    May 10, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    I love your writing. This post – regardless of my opinion – is thought-provoking, so thanks!
    Lydia recently posted..Why I love Shakespeare, frog dissections, and the Protestant Reformation: Happy Teacher Appreciation weekMy Profile

    • Reply
      May 10, 2012 at 6:19 pm

      thank you!

  • Reply
    May 10, 2012 at 3:26 pm

    No comment on the Time picture I just don’t have enough time to address that. As for the POTUS and his stance who cares what people think he didn’t say he was going to change the laws he just said he agree that people should have the right. People are worried about the wrong things their are very little jobs and people are still trying to make ends meat let’s fight about that instead of what people want to do with their lives.
    Kita recently posted..Whatever WednesdayMy Profile

    • Reply
      May 10, 2012 at 6:20 pm


  • Reply
    This Cookn Mom
    May 10, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    Every christian, especially the pastor, needs to remember that verse on Sunday because I know it is going to be a hot topic.
    This Cookn Mom recently posted..Daddy’s GirlsMy Profile

    • Reply
      May 10, 2012 at 6:19 pm

      I know that’s right!!!

  • Reply
    May 10, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    Girl, I had to rewrite about 10 times before it was coherent!

  • Reply
    May 10, 2012 at 11:12 pm

    The picture says it all, so I don’t have to say anything to that. I am a breast feeding pusher, but for me and my house I didn’t feel comfortable BF after a certain age and I didn’t have to worry about it because my children weened themselves early 🙂

    As for the stance on gay marriage… AMEN and AMEN! Some Christians are making Christ Followers look real bad…

  • Reply
    May 11, 2012 at 10:00 am

    You tell ’em girl! I say to each his own. You do what is right for you (regarding the breastfeeding). As for gay marriages, I say, if it makes the couple happy, so be it. Who am I to step in the middle of someone’s happiness?
    KalleyC recently posted..Life’s LessonsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Dr. Reginia
    May 12, 2012 at 7:50 am

    When does pushing the envelop go too…this time with Time.I understand wanting to create a “Think Tank” and buzz around certain issues but this represents molestation. Its provocative nature is a bit too far left.

    I don’t know how I feel about the President making a stance on the issue of gay marriage. I am not sure if I agree with him making a stance. I don’t think it helped his campaign to do so. I am a conservative liberal who is NOT Christian. While I believe in equal liberties I infuriates me when gay rights are equated to the struggle of equal liberties that black American struggle to maintain.

    Great post.
    Dr. Reginia recently posted..the Baby Shopaholic + Neiman Marcus = GreatnessMy Profile

  • Reply
    May 12, 2012 at 8:39 am

    I agree with you on both fronts! The Time magazine cover is meant to shock and awe readers instead of really beginning a productive conversation. Sad. And, I, too, am happy with Obama’s stance on gay marriage. Very happy! 🙂
    Jessica recently posted..Taking Memories Offline| Bellflower Books GiveawayMy Profile

  • Reply
    May 12, 2012 at 9:01 am

    OOOhh…I heard about the Time cover but hadn’t seen it. It is provocative and not the right angle to approach this issue. As for judging, you have to remember that scripture calls us to confront sin in others after we examine ourselves. So really the debate isn’t about judging but about defining sin. Stopping by from SITS.
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  • Reply
    Savvy Working Gal
    May 12, 2012 at 9:15 am

    I agree this is a very thought-provoking post. This is the first time I’ve really looked at the “Time” photo. I have to say I don’t know, couldn’t they have found a less sexualized looking photo. One of the messages of my blog is to inspire women to be more than their looks. I don’t think this photo helps my cause any. I don’t have much of an opinion about breast feeding since I’m not a mom. I do have thoughts on gay marriage, though, since I have a family member who is gay. It has been hard on my mom who is a devout catholic. She used to leave religious articles lying around the house hoping my brother would read them and change his sexual orientation. Sorry mom, it doesn’t work that way. Sure it would be great if he would have married a nice gal and had tons of kids, but that isn’t going to happen. Instead we have to accept him for who he is and hope he can find happiness. And why can he be entitled to the same rights as everyone else. It is easier to see the other side when someone you know is affected.

  • Reply
    May 12, 2012 at 9:27 am

    Hi! I’m visiting from SITS! This was a wonderful post, I agree completely!
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  • Reply
    Rachel Cotterill
    May 12, 2012 at 10:59 am

    I just found your blog via SITS – and I couldn’t agree more. As it happens, I have some friends from mainland Europe where breastfeeding until two or three is perfectly normal (while in the UK it’d be very unusual) but by putting that image on the cover of the magazine I think they’re being very provocative and undermining any discussion of actual issues 🙁
    Rachel Cotterill recently posted..Review: Mrs Tuesday’s DepartureMy Profile

  • Reply
    May 12, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    Well said.

    Stopping by from SITS. Have a great weekend.
    misssrobin recently posted..Gay Marriage and My HeartMy Profile

  • Reply
    May 12, 2012 at 2:21 pm

    Excellent post! I’m a firm proponent of breastfeeding, but up to that age? No, no, and no. I’ll have to read the article, but just… no. And asking if someone is mom enough is a horrible war to start.

    Great stance on gay marriage too. I agree.

    Visiting via SITS Sharefest 🙂
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  • Reply
    May 12, 2012 at 2:55 pm

    Fantastic post. Came over from SITS as soon as I saw the title of your post because I knew I would like it. I wrote about Time also, but not about the picture at all, actually. My beef is with the headline. And the timing. And the headline.
    Anyway, great job here, I loved it!
    thedoseofreality recently posted..“Time” To Read Another MagazineMy Profile

  • Reply
    May 13, 2012 at 11:26 am

    I love this! Yes, even though I’m Christian I try NOT to judge ANYONE!
    BossyGirl recently posted..Adventures in Boxing : Sweat Shop BoxingMy Profile

  • Reply
    May 13, 2012 at 11:50 am

    I swear we are on the same wavelength! First, the pic on the cover was a bit too much for me. I even said to someone that I thought it was photoshopped because it was a bit much. I didn’t even bother reading the article because the cover made me uncomfortable. Not because I am adverse to women breastfeeding, but because its a bit jarring to see a child who appears to be school age with a boob in his mouth. The issue is appropriate, but who cares if you can’t get past the cover.

    As for the gay marriage issue, I have just about as many gay friends as I do straight friends. And at the end of the day, I honestly believe that it is none of my damn business. I support marriage for those who are in love and mature enough to understand its sanctity. One’s sexual orientation does not make me waver from this position. I believe in living and letting live…and I am both a liberal and a Christian. I am quite proud of our President for holding his ground. And to those who have such a strong opinion against gay marriage, I encourage them to worry about themselves.

    Because I wish to refrain from clogging up your comments with my position on both of these issues from the standpoint of an attorney, I’ll shut up now…

    Happy Mother’s Day!!
    TheProDiva recently posted..Let’s Celebrate National Women’s Health Week!!!My Profile

  • Reply
    May 14, 2012 at 8:56 pm

    Great post, I saw the interview on the Today Show with the mom. I am very old school, that was too much. I agree that people should have the right to marry whomever they want and I also am a Christian and believe in not judging. It’s one of the things we should work on as Christians. It’s tough, but I try my best not to judge.
    Whitney recently posted..Comment on Happy Mother’s Day! by WhitneyMy Profile

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