Why do dead baby thoughts persist?
Here I am 23 weeks, 5 days. And I am scared/paranoid beyond belief.
Baby boy hasn’t been moving as much here lately. In the past few weeks, he has been a active little person, kicking and squirming away. Now, there is almost nothing.
Now, intellectually, I know that really, baby movements at this stage are usually sporadic. That since he’s not very big, I can’t feel each and every movment he makes. But still…..where is he?
I’ve tried to rationalize it:
Maybe he turned, and that’s why I don’t feel all those kicks now.
My placenta is at the top, and he could be kicking that instead of me.
Maybe I am feeling his elbows and hands now instead of his feet.
Maybe he’s just really active when I am sleep.
I am trying to hold on to hope here. I am begging God to let everything be OK, and let me feel something, ANYTHING.
Or maybe I’m just really paranoid.
I just had to get that out this morning. Keeping it all in was driving me crazy.