Letters to My Son: Today, You are Ten

Dear Pookah, 

Today you are 10.

I don’t know why this birthday has hit me harder than the others. Maybe it’s the fact that it is double digits?

Or that I can’t see the baby in your face anymore?

Or the fact that I went from Mama to Mom this year?

Sometimes, I watch you, unobserved, and I see the maturity and confidence that you have and wonder where did it come from? When did it arrive?

You never seem to even think that you CAN’T do something.  It’s not arrogance, but simply the fact that you have never been told that you CAN’T do something and you fully believe in yourself.  

And then there is your mind.

OMG that brain of yours is always working!   And asking, and trying to learn more.  Sometimes I feel interrogated! 

Who made the Eiffel Tower?

Explain impeachment.

How long do you bake chicken?

What does Transgender mean?

There are no airports in the North Pole, so how are those letters getting to Santa?  

But then the sweet silly you, he’s still there. The one that still loves kisses and cuddles and hugs and needs to be RIGHT UP UNDER ME ALL THE TIME.

You are eveything. 

To me.

Every single day, I am proud to be your mom.

I am proud whenever your teacher tells me that you never give her any trouble.

I am proud whenever I notice you grabbing the vacuum and cleaning up.

Or whenever you tell me, it’s ok Mom, I can do it myself. 

You are growing up.

I’ve only got 7 more years with you under my roof full time. 

I’m trying to remember to slow down and take the time to really enjoy you. 

But no matter what, you will always be my baby boy. My Sweet Pookah Bear Baby.

Love you

Mom